High School, oh what a euphemism!
The institution that consumes four years of an individual's life is the stepping stone or breaking point in many adolescents' lives. It has influenced my introspection and my maturity. In high school I have encountered the pressures of reality that caused the fibers of my being to decay. My history teacher explained America’s neutral involvement in WWI. However, I saw an absence of logic. It was non-credible for one nation to be neutral since trading with their Allies- if there is an ally, there is a foe. My parents grew-up in former Communist Yugoslavia thus I was privileged to grow-up with un-biased objectivities and in order to truly understand history I must understand interpretations. Yet, high school did not teach me that. Instead, I questioned the validity of my teachers’ teachings. Due to these teachings my desire for school was adrift, yet passions for knowledge consumed me. I questioned the material world I inhabited, and dreamed of becoming a diplomat for the United Nations. Even at a young age was I aware of corrupted, misguided people and their ability to pollute my thoughts. However, the teachers were corrupt because of their environment that conditioned them to think a certain way and were disillusioned by the matrix.
Fearing of becoming a robot, I questioned the education system. I came to the epiphany that my individuality was being restricted and my thinking was narrow. Due to the modern norms of society, education appears as though conforming was my only option. The drive to succeed scholastically somewhat diminished my social life. Admittedly, my social life was inoperative, since I had identical daily routines. My agenda consisted of going through the motions of going to school, regurgitating information and complying to authority but my focus to be an intellectual role model still remained. I started to suffocate in my own desire to understand a deeper meaning and relinquished my autonomy as a creative being, but school restricted that growth. It is a constant reminder of how monotonous life can be. This led me to perceive important things in my life differently, and value myself as an individual. It was almost as if all of a sudden deep thoughts were spilling out into my awareness. My constant questioning ranges from the “Is the universe actually a hologram?” to “What will the world's reaction be to my reformation?” Challenging my neurons with such a question thrills me. For a reason unknown to me, these feelings felt as though they were hiding in my subconscious looking for a change to arise. From then on I became a cynic.
It was better for me to find my own answers and make an educated decision, than to intentionally remain ignorant and be forced to make a decision out of fear. I no longer take things at face value, but try to understand the meaning behind everything, and most importantly, I have learned how to understand myself. Thoughts of collaboration are forever streaming into my consciousness. The nature of my indoctrination; knowledge without wisdom- absolutely undeniably biased with regards to favoring the left brain over the right brain. Literally all of the core subjects are left brain based subjects. Now just based simply on this one framework, I synthesized that the education system whether purposely or coincidentally is labeling half of my brain as essential and the other half of my brain as optional. I questioned matters of the Universe, Science, Religion, and life in general. We're all different, but equal. I worried that mankind does not understand humanity. I hope to balance conventional wisdom with fresh perspective, irony, and the occasional sarcastic observation. If only my thoughts were incorporated to a productive lifestyle could I have done something of greater importance. In fact the real thinker is gone and only a lifeless statue is left behind put together by the unknown warrior perhaps.